Torn

What do you do when 2 people confide in you about the other? Such is my case. And I am torn between trying to mediate between the two and just letting them vent. I have chosen the latter, for world peace. Not that I’m afraid that my own relationship will suffer because of my meddling but because I think they really don’t need mediation at all. On one hand, I feel good that people confide in me. That means they trust me to keep their secrets, which I do. I never divulge any information about another person which will truly hurt that other person. I’m no saint but there are really some things I keep sacred, keeping one person’s secret is one of them. On the other hand, sometimes I want to tell the other about what the other might have been thinking that would have started the misunderstanding in the first place. But there are times when we need to keep our mouths shut and just lend a shoulder, an ear, and our time.

There are times though when the burden is so great, I can only pray for these people and hope that one day they’ll resolve all their differences as quickly as possible. And then I think about my own life. Sometimes I feel so down in the dumps that I am totally convinced that I am alone. But it turns out I’m not. And in the face of adversity, pain and tribulations, I am surrounded by people who I love and who loves and cares for me in return.

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Published in: on October 13, 2007 at 8:23 pm  Comments (9)  

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9 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I totally agree with your last lines. Sometimes it’s good to have someone who listens to your worries. It really helps a lot dealing and coping and knowing that you are the person they can trust. Have a wonderful weekend!

    Thanks, Maps!

  2. I think being trustworthy is a virtue on the one hand but a burden on the other. Most of the time it’s not even a choice you have to make. If people gravitate towards you because they believe that you are the right person to approach then rejoice in that fact. Just don’t let their problems affect you. No matter how difficult it is. Just like you said, be the shoulder to cry on, the ear that will listen, even the heart that will understand. But always remember, it’s not your problem. Hirap gawin pero kailangan otherwise mabigat talaga. Cheers my friend 🙂

  3. Hi Mitch. I’ve been on a similar situation and I understand how tough the situation can be. It’s not easy being in the middle. I hope that somehow those people can find peace.

    I’m glad that during low moments, you can find comfort in the people you love. It’s a blessing worth being grateful for.

    BTW, I have an award waiting for you on my blog.

  4. Thanks for the words of wisdom, Cookie. Much appreciated!

    Hi Rach, thanks for the award. pero Mary po ang name ko, hindi Mitch. LOL 😀 No worries!

  5. Ako Mary I have a phobia about this confiding part. For a long time I tolerated a “friend”s confiding to me about a common friend thinking that she just needed to vent but after a while I found out that she has been doing the rounds of venting to friends (some whom she expressed disliked to me and others) about me. Sometimes we are so blinded by the friendship that it’s difficult to judge if it’s really confiding or gossiping na. So I hope these friends treats you like how you would treat a real friend.

  6. Hi Geri, can’t blame you. There are people out there who seem to enjoy badmouthing other people. I’m sorry you had an experience like this. And I agree, I do hope these friends of mine treat me like a real friend, like how I’m treating them right now.

  7. Hi Mary, same sentiments here, it’s really hard to listen to friends’ problems/worries/concerns and they sometimes expect us to side with him/her against a common friend. Really a dilemma.

  8. Hi Mary! I definitely agree with you. It’s indeed difficult to be a mediator of two people especially if both are friends. I had once encountered a problem with it because when they are ok already she told our other friend with stuff which I never ever said. I only listened to both of them and that’s it. As much as possible I stayed in the middle but then in the end it’s me who turned out bad. Naks! From that time onwards, I never avail to their stories no matter what happened to them.

    By the way, I added you already.

  9. Hi Rowena! So true about sometimes they expect us to side with them. And then in the end whatever you said will haunt you or can be taken against you. 😦

    Hi MarieJ! Thanks for adding me. I guess everybody has almost the same dilemma. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this.


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